So many of us enter into parenthood without fully understanding the depth of what it means to step into this role. At times I have felt myself stretched so far beyond the edge of my capacity. On the verge of my breaking point - feeling like I can’t possibly hold one more thing.
Photo by Kinga Howard
As we care for our children we find ourselves collapsing under the weight of the mental load, and the impossibility of singularly doing the work of caretaking that was once meant for many.
Add on the layers of breaking generational trauma and the guilt that inevitably comes when we make mistakes, and we find ourselves feeling utterly exhausted by modern day motherhood.
It’s no wonder that so many moms are burnt out.
Mom burnout looks like…
“Going through the motions,” instead of feeling present or engaged in your life
Losing your temper
Feeling like you’re never “good enough”
Feeling disconnected from yourself
A deep exhaustion that you can’t shake
So, how do we break the cycle?
The good news is that recovering from mom burnout is possible. While burnout is normal, it does not have to be our baseline.
Here are a few things I’ve learned over the years to help break the cycle.
1️⃣ Plan Breaks From Parenting - Taking a break from your kids is not selfish, it is selfish intelligence. When you are struggling and feeling overwhelmed, that has an impact on your kids, relationships, and work. BUT, when you take breaks and care for yourself, your entire family system thrives. Taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of your kids.
2️⃣ Community Care - For most mothers, the idea of self-care can feel impossible without the support of others. Mothers thrive when they find themselves surrounded by a community of people who show up. If you are feeling isolated and wondering how to build community, the answer is to invest in your relationships. Lean into the vulnerable and sometimes uncomfortable edge of reaching out and creating connection.
3️⃣ Move Your Body - When I’m stressed out, it can feel like second nature to de-prioritize my own needs when in fact, I should be loving and nurturing myself as much as possible. One of the ways that I care for myself as a mom, is to make sure that I move my body every single day. Moving your body helps to lower your body’s stress hormones and boost the production of endorphins.
4️⃣ Ask For Help - For many moms, asking for help can be the biggest challenge to overcome. Our culture puts so much weight on being independent, that we sometimes forget the value of leaning into others for support. We were never meant to do this alone.
Looking for support?
If you are looking for support around breaking the cycle of burnout in motherhood, join The Postpartum Coaching Program. The Postpartum Coaching Program provides you with the tools to set healthy boundaries, gain control of your time and energy, and move through your parenting journey with more ease and confidence.